Not too long ago, I watched some videos where they said “Don’t be shy to put yourself out there. What if you are the exact representation that someone needed? Your shyness would take away their chance to connect with the world.”
That is one of the main reasons why I am starting this blog.
I don’t have a fancy life. I don’t have much to show. I know I am an average, leading an average life.
And as someone with the Buddhist viewpoint in life, I am okay with that.
However, what if me just putting myself online can help someone one day?
Being a Korean American, being a software dev, being a transfemme, etc. Nothing is special if you look at them one by one.
But I know I am unique in a sense that Asian trans people are underrepresented and that transfemme people are underrepresented in comparison to trans women. So my presence could help someone one day. Who knows.
If not, I’ll just treat this as a secondary journal and allow myself to be a bit more expressive than before.
Welcome to my blog
p.s. I use the term transfemme (instead of trans woman) to identify myself in my M2F trans journey. The difference to me is that I don’t necessary want to transition all the way; I don’t necessarily want every feminine features and characteristics; I don’t think I’d want to be born a female even if I had a chance to (but just maybe transition earlier than I did in late 20s). I don’t know if it’s because I was conditioned to be a man and that I’d “never be a woman”. But I’m just trying to find my happiness with what I am comfortable with now. Who knows? My trans life is very different than what I imagined when I came out 4-5 years ago, and it has been for the better, surprisingly.
p.p.s. I also want to add that I am very slow (and “behind”) in my transition journey. Due to heavy mental blocks (- I am working on my autism), I haven’t learned how to dress up, how to apply makeup, how to do my hair, or how to talk or act more feminine; I gave numerous tries and I even had a voice coach for months but it still feels like I made minimal chances. It also doesn’t help that I grew up with two brothers and a tomboy-ish mom. Oh well, wish me luck